children

THE ENTITY CALLED ‘A CHILD’

The scripture refers to a child as a heritage of the Lord. The great philosopher, John Locke, sees a child as a being who has a mind as plain as a clean slate.

A child is a mysterious entity created by God with distinctive traits, abilities, and intellect. Hence, what frames the character, behavioral pattern, belief system, and personal philosophy of the man a child later becomes, is a combination of his inborn abilities and the little, little drops of words, actions, inactions, that he has observed and imbibed over time through his interaction with his immediate family members, his religious group, the school, and the larger society.

It is therefore important that every individual (young, old, male, or female) who surrounds a child and interacts with him as he grows, be conscious of his actions because a child is a very good imitator of what he sees others around him do. This is pertinent as each of the actions and inactions of the people around is writing something on the clean slate of the mind of the child who may not necessarily showcase this immediately, as the case may be, but will ultimately reflect such in later years.  

Parents or guardian must understand that they are the first and best role model their children can ever have. You shouldn’t just tell a child (teenagers and youths inclusive) what to do, show him how to do it! You don’t just tell a child what not to do, let him see your hatred for the things you claim to be bad and with little effort, he’ll follow suit!

Every child, except in the case of spiritual manipulations; which may be positive or negative, is a perfect reflection of the belief, value, culture/tradition, and religious doctrines of his family, the school he attends, and the environment he interacts with daily. It is therefore not fair to judge or condemn an erring/stubborn/morally deficient teenager or youth in isolation, without first making inquiries into his family background and the environment where he grew.

This, therefore, tells us as parents and guardians, we can, to a large extent, determine the kind of man or woman that we want our children to be. We first hand them over to God, whose heritage they are, and we consciously model them into the glorious, independent, disciplined, diligent, reliable, and morally shaped individual that we desire, through our teachings, encouraging words, giving a reward for good deeds and appropriate/prompt punishment for wrong deeds.

Never overlook their wrongs and don’t trivialize their good deeds. Rewards will motivate them to do more good deeds and appropriate punishment will keep them from doing the wrong things. Children are not robots who you tell just what to do, they have a mind that can process every action and inactions of people around them. So let’s correct them in love and promptly too!

Shalom!

YOUR WORDS ARE SEEDS!

The efficacy and efficiency of the spoken words are not to be trivialized. Man’s words carry weight. It has meaning and can shape an individual’s life, positively or negatively. As humans, the mysterious work of the highest being, we have the creative ability of God to create, through spoken words. The word of God is quick, powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword. Likewise, God honors the words of man. We have seen how seemingly ordinary men, have used spoken words to redirect the affairs/destinies of people. We have seen instances where parents continually speak certain words into the lives of their children and they begin to reflect what has been pronounced into their lives. And there are times when men by themselves, have used their mouth to profess good things into their lives which later became their experiences.

The words that are most significant in the life of a man are the words spoken by God; the words of his parents; and what he says about himself. God said several things concerning several people in the bible. He declared into the life of the first man (Adam) to be fruitful, multiply, and replenish the earth. He declared that Abraham will be a father of nations. He declared Cain a fugitive after he killed his brother, Abel. He said Michal would be barren for life and she was the only barren woman recorded in the bible who never conceived till death. The mother of Jabez called his name sorrow and it became a limitation upon his life till he had a divine encounter and his bonds were broken. Jacob pronounced instability into the life of Reuben, his firstborn. He said he shall not prosper! Isaac pronounced trans-generational blessings on Jacob and made him lord over his twin brother. David, when he confronted Goliath said, "This day, the Lord will deliver you into my hand, and I will smite you and take your head from you" and it was so. The three Hebrew boys said unto king Nebuchadnezzar, ‘Our God whom we serve can deliver us from your fiery furnace, even if He doesn’t, we won’t bow’, and they got their deliverance. The woman with the issue of blood said “if I may touch but his clothes, I shall be whole” and it was so.

This background should therefore equip every parent/guardian with the assurance and confidence that, their words count. Their proclamation over their children is very significant. They can employ the tool of the efficacy of spoken words to create and recreate their children’s world. They can declare what they want and renounce what they do not want to see in the lives of their children.

Even when it seems as though the words are not working, keep on speaking!

Never stop speaking. You are planting seeds!

It may take time to grow, don’t be discouraged, keep on sowing!

You are changing things in the spirit realm.

It may not be evident yet, don’t relent, keep on sowing!

You will reap the dividend in due time.

Shalom!

TRAIN UP THE CHILD!

The book of Proverbs chapter 22 verse 6 says “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it”. This biblical injunction is a command and also a piece of advice to parents or guardians on child upbringing and training. We’re told to ‘Train Up!’ That is, to start from the cradle; the foundation, and continue to train. Nonstop, till they become what their creator intended for them, from the foundation of the world.   

No child grows in a day. It’s a continuous process of teaching, mentoring, modeling, tutoring, correcting, encouraging, imparting, and praying. It must be noted also, that you can’t get the best out of your children without a fight! You need to persistently fight wrong beliefs, ungodly behaviors, uncultured character, juvenile delinquency in adolescents, wrong societal principles, immoral values, and bad friends.

As a parent or guardian, it is pertinent to know that, you can’t afford to stop talking to them. The danger of your silence is if you’re not talking to them or training them, something or someone else is! The internet is teaching them something. The entertainment industry is teaching them something. Friends in school are teaching them something. So to control what stays in them and make up their principles and way of life, you must make your voice loud and audible enough to silence every other negative voice that may be speaking negativity.

Train up your child in daily reading, studying, and meditating on the word of God. The best guide you can give to your child is God’s word. It enlightens, illuminates, directs, and reproofs. It’s the voice that will echo in their ears when they are not within your reach, far away in boarding schools or higher institutions of learning.

Likewise, you train up a child through the right modeling. This involves a conscious effort to make yourself what you want to see in your children. If you want them to be trustworthy, you have to portray honesty, sincerity, transparency and be reliable in your dealings with them and other people. This works faster than just telling them because children are good imitators of what they see others around them do. When a child sees something being done over time, with little effort, they do likewise, most times, unconsciously.