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Loneliness is another serious issue in this present generation.  It is another silent killer among the youth. The Psalmist in Psalm 142vs4 shouted, look to my right and see; no one is concerned for me.  I have no refuge; no one cares for my life.

Loneliness is a feeling of inner emptiness which can be accompanied by discouragement, sadness, a sense of isolation, restlessness, and an intense desire to be wanted and needed by someone.

Loneliness is completely different from being alone but it is the awareness that you lack meaningful contact with others; that is why the writer of the above Psalm has to go further in verse 5 of Psalm 142 to say “I cry to you, O Lord; I say, “you are my refuge.  My portion in the land of the living”.

The writer of that Psalm is saying this because he is feeling the inner emptiness that is propelling loneliness.  There are many types of loneliness that are oppressing the mind of people, especially the youth; but we will be taking a few of them in this message today.

  • Emotional Loneliness: This involves a lack of a psychologically intimate relationship with another person or persons. This form of loneliness has pushed many youths, that is single to rush into marriage in search of solutions. Psalm 25vs16-17.
  • Social Loneliness: This is caused by feelings of anxiety and emptiness. The reality in our community and society at large is that people are now being conscious of going out with another because in our society now, everybody is now a suspect and that alone is breeding social loneliness.
  • Existential Loneliness: This is the sense of isolation that comes to someone who is separated from God and feels that life has no meaning.

CAUSES OF LONELINESS

  • Poor Family Relationship: Many are parents that do not have time to take care of and build a bond with their wards. The situation now is, for a whole week, many parents do not have any form of contact with their children; work and the mindset of making more money have taken the place of relationships within the family. Psalm 27vs10.
  • Hostility: This is a feeling of anger and bitterness that alienates others and drives them away. Bitterness can result in distrust for everyone that comes around; it could be a result of past disappointment(s). Numbers 11vs14-15, Jeremiah 15vs17.
  • Changing Circumstances: This can be a situation where there is a change of school, environment, job, break up of a long-term relationship, marriage, etc.
  • Unfulfilled Expectations: Accomplished goals, dreams and expectations, academic pursuits, financial obstacles; health failure, and many more can birth loneliness. Being in a relationship that is not working can also cause loneliness.

Until one knows how to successfully handle failure and disappointment, one will never know the joy of success.  Proverbs 24vs16, Micah 7vs8.

The feeling of non-acceptance and alienation; sexual frustration and pressure can also cause loneliness.  1 Corinthians 6vs18. In a situation in which your attention is always drawn to yourself only and none other (self-centeredness) and a search for identity that covers all areas of life; can also lead to loneliness.  Luke 12vs19-20.

THE WAY OUT OF LONELINESS

  • Rest in God’s love. Matthew 11vs28, Genesis 2vs18

You need to understand that nobody can love you the way God will do, and you also need to know that it is not the will of God that you should be alone (lonely). It is until when you come to the understanding of this fact that you can rest in God’s love.  God loves you and he is mindful of you.

  • Build Relationships with God. Romans 8vs15-17, 1 Peter 5vs6, 2 Timothy 4vs16-17.

You need to cultivate an intimate relationship with God, also work and walk in the consciousness that you are not alone, God is always with you and will always defend you even when and where no one will; when you put this into action, you will overcome the battle of loneliness.

  • Self-Inventory. 2 Corinthians 13vs5.

You need to also examine yourself and be sincere in your examination of yourself.  What you know you cannot achieve in ten years, do not say you want to achieve in one month.

Many times you know the relationship that will not work and the one that is harmful to you but because you are not being sincere with yourself that is why you long on to them; if you have to overcome loneliness, you have to be sincere with yourself in every aspect of your life by not taking more than what you can chew.

  • Plan Yourself.

He who fails to plan has plans to fail. Learn the habit of not rushing into things without planning your way.  Wishes never produced a triumph. Arise and take positive steps.  Read good books and engage yourself in writing. You can also go for professional counseling. Proverbs 11vs14.

  • Cultivate the Attitude of Giving. Matthew 7vs12.

Focus on giving, not receiving, and ensure that you always do to people what you want them to do to you; this is because a bad tree cannot bring out good fruits. It is what you project to people that they will give back to you.

  • Take Responsibility.

Blame is self-defeating while responsibility is self-actualizing. Stop blaming your loneliness on others, because as long as you do, you will remain in the same spot.  Start taking responsibility for the choices you make.

  • Focus on the positive.

In the journey of life, there are times that you will face or experience negative circumstances but it is easy to overcome when you are positive-minded.

The truth is, if you are polite and friendly, you will attract others to yourself.  If you wish to attract birds, scatter bread crumbs, if you wish to attract friends, scatter seeds of love.

CONCLUSION: You need to understand that loneliness is completely different from being alone.  You can completely overcome loneliness when you rest in the love of the Father (God) for you. Devil will always play the drum of a sense of isolation, restlessness, and feelings of inner emptiness in your mind but when you embrace the love of God for you, you will overcome it all; Jesus Christ is the true love of God to mankind and when you walk with Him, you are more than a thousand people. Just like the saying; one with God is with a majority.  Come to Jesus Christ, he loves you more than you can ever imagine, in Him lies the power to overcome your loneliness.